Caravan Witch (Questing Witch Book 2) Page 3

  “She isn’t here . . .” What could I tell her? Marley couldn’t have been more than thirteen. She didn’t deserve to know all the horrors that had befallen her sister. I swallowed and she stepped away from Alex so I could really get a look at her.

  Though her eyes were tearing up, her jaw was firm and her shoulders were not stooped as though she was hiding. Yes, she was behind Alex, but I wondered how much of that was habit. The more I looked at her, the more I saw the woman inside the child.

  “She’s like you, Pam,” Oka said. “Young, but fierce.”

  Even as Oka spoke I could see that in Marley. Different coloring, same heart and body that had been forged in the fires of adversity. She looked young, but there was strength in her eyes like a fire flashing as she dragged them away from the caravan and settled them on me once more. A challenge to give her the truth.

  “I can handle it,” she said. “No matter how bad it is. I just need to know the truth.”

  I dared a look at Alex. He gave me the subtlest of nods.

  They were sure, but I wasn’t. Not even a little bit. So young, and suddenly, I understood a little better why my own mentor had tried to shield me from the fights, from the monsters. Because even though I thought I could handle it, the nightmares came to me now, reminding me of all I’d done.

  But my life, my choices didn’t matter here. Macey had fought hard for her sister, fought to stay alive in the hopes that one day they’d be reunited. She’d lost, but she’d still fought. And Marley deserved to know that truth above anything else.

  “A few weeks back, we had a different witch leading the caravan. She didn’t notice the signs, and we wandered into a zombie nest. Macey fought hard, she always did. But it wasn’t enough that time and she fell to them.” My own emotions swelled, and I bit the inside of my cheek to hold them in check. “I’m sorry, Marley. I truly am.”

  Tears sprang to her eyes and slipped silently down her face. “There’s more to it than that, isn’t there?”

  I sucked in a breath, the sight of her tears threatening my own resolve. The whole ugly memory played out in my mind like a horror movie while I watched Marley cry.

  The zombie tearing into Macey’s flesh, my fight to kill it afterward, and my fight to save Macey, my failure to even do that. My complete and utter failure, which left me with only one option if I was the friend to her that I thought I was. Kill the one human friend I had in our broken world. I had been through a lot in my short life. Killing Macey was second on the list of the worst shit I’d been forced to do. A very close second.

  And now, I had to explain to her little sister how it had all gone down. Goddess save me from the twisted world we lived in and the horrors it pressed on the innocent.

  Alex put a hand on the girl’s shoulder and tugged her into a single-armed hug. “I’m sorry, Marley.”

  Marley hugged Alex and then turned to me. “Wait, is she still out there . . .” She trailed off, but I didn’t let her hang there for long.

  I held up both hands, palms facing her, and shook my head. “No. She isn’t a zombie. I made sure of that.” I pushed the images of trying to save Macey, and what I’d had to do when I couldn’t, out of my head. I was done reliving it. I had to be. This world didn’t leave time for grieving. Because while you were moping, there was some other creature waiting to take your bloody head off.

  Pushing the grief and memories aside felt like an injustice to Macey, and all the others I’d lost for that matter. But standing there in front of her baby sister, something like closure settled in on me. It was an odd sensation I hadn’t felt for a long time. Marley being here was a second chance. Or third or fourth, depending how you were counting.

  Maybe this time I could keep her alive, make up for losing her sister.

  “Thank you,” Marley said. “For not letting her wander around, dead like that. She would have hated it. Always hated those zombie movies and shows from before, you know?”

  I nodded but said nothing. To be honest, it was the weirdest thing I’d ever been thanked for. Killing someone’s family member. But I knew what she meant and was glad for the fact that she had enough sense in her head to realize I’d done the best I could. I’d saved Macey from that life of wandering death, if you could call it a life. I’d searched for Macey’s soul before I’d ended her and found nothing. So she wasn’t even in there when I killed her, was she? But I supposed that wasn’t the argument.

  It was that I’d saved her from killing other innocents. From becoming a monster herself. From finally losing her humanity to the broken world we lived in.

  “She was a good friend, and I’m so sorry I couldn’t do more,” I said.

  “I get it, I do,” Marley said. “I knew it was a long shot that she was alive, if she wasn’t turned like me, that is.”

  Richard gave a whistle from behind and I held up a hand with two fingers. A few more minutes and I’d bring him in.

  Only weeks had passed since Macey’s death, and a part of me mourned that if she’d just hung on a little longer, if she’d contained some of that rage and been a little more careful, she could’ve seen Marley. She could’ve maybe found some peace and happiness herself. The thought made me sad, and I swallowed hard looking at how well her sister looked. Better than Macey ever did. She wasn’t on the edge of survival, on the edge of being starved to death, fearful that a man would try to rape her.

  Alex had taken good care of Marley, saving her from the harassment so many women in our world endured, from scrambling for the next meal, from wondering what was going to come for them in the darkest corner of the night.

  All because Marley had found Alex.

  And Macey had found me.

  As if reading my mind, Alex mussed her hair. “I found this little straggler by the side of the road. All wet and shivering in the rain. So pitiful, I couldn’t leave her behind.”

  “Al-lex,” Marley protested and brushed his hand off her head, though she did smile a little. “No, he did not. He saved me is what he did.” More than a little adoration went into those words. Even with her grief fresh, she still held it together. Yeah, she had some steel spine in there.

  I nodded. “That sounds like Alex.” Because it did. Of course he’d saved her. It’s what he did. Save terrified young girls—it’s what he’d done for me.

  Surprisingly, Mac kept his distance during the whole exchange. I knew he was there. His presence was unmistakable. But he didn’t lay a possessive arm around me. Maybe Oka’s peacock comment had sunk in. He stayed close but kept quiet. I almost wished he wouldn’t. I wished he would say something.

  But that woman—Jasmine—had no such reservations. She draped a too-thin arm over Alex’s shoulder, and a sly smile grabbed at one corner of her mouth. The sharp angles of her chiseled face accentuated the expression. As if she’d been carved out of stone or a petrified cow chip.

  Which did nothing to ease my dislike of her. She just rubbed me the wrong fucking way. And it had nothing to do with her arm around Alex. Not a thing.

  Really.

  Alex ignored Jasmine, but he didn’t knock her arm off him either. “I’m not sure I’d call it saving. What could I do? Leave you there?” He turned to me, his golden eyes full of excitement to tell me the story. Just like old times, save for the gorgeous woman draped over him.

  “I saw her get dragged away by the pack, shortly after the breaking settled. Her sister fought for her, but they beat her to within an inch of her life. Frankly, I thought she was a lost cause which is why I didn’t stop for her too,” he said, but Marley shook her head. “Anyway, I thought I’d stick with the little one. She was in a lot more danger. But I couldn’t get to her then. I was alone. And one wolf against an entire pack . . . well. Even I’m not that good.” He winked at Marley.

  “I’ve faced worse odds,” I said, but I didn’t know why. It wasn’t a contest, and I wasn’t judging him for not going in after her. I was, however, having trouble taking my eyes off his companion. Jasmine. Apparently.


  “I’m sure you have, Pammy. Alex has been regaling us with how amazing you are. I mean, you’d think you’d been pulled from an angel’s arms and placed on earth just to save us all.” Jasmine shifted her stance and tossed her hair over her shoulder. It was dark, with blond tips, and I wondered what she looked like as a wolf—I’d not seen her when Alex had called the two girls to him. Probably fucking perfect, and jealousy of my own reared its ugly green head.

  I resisted the urge to roll my eyes and forced my attention back to Alex. Wasn’t Jasmine’s fault Alex had talked me up.

  Alex looked from Jasmine to me and raised an eyebrow. “Anyway, eventually, I was able to separate her from the pack, and we’ve been together ever since. She’s not particularly good at cooking, but she’s wildly good at killing those damn archies.”

  “Oh, I like her.” Oka rubbed against my leg, trotted over and sat in front of Marley, all but begging to be picked up.

  “It was a bit more involved than that,” Marley said, adoration dripping from her eyes as she watched Alex. And why wouldn’t she adore him? He was perfect. Except for that showpiece he had hanging around his waist. When had she moved her arm down there? And why did I care? Didn’t. Didn’t care.

  Marley bent and scooped up Oka. “He came in one night about a week after they took me. He scared the bejeezus out of me. I thought he was one of the pack’s wolves.”

  She actually said bejeezus, and Alex laughed. She beamed at the sound, and I couldn’t help but smile right along with her.

  “He snuck into the camp all Mission Impossible style, and I almost ruined it when he surprised me. It was a miracle we made it out of there without waking one of the wolves. And you really outfoxed the sentinels, didn’t you?” She gave him a playful shove with one hand, which did absolutely nothing to move him, big as he was.

  “They weren’t that hard to outfox. Didn’t seem like they had much going on upstairs,” Alex said, pulling her in close again.

  “No, it was brilliant. He was throwing rocks and sticks to make them think we were somewhere else. While they were investigating, we slipped away. He never even had to fight someone. Although I know he would’ve won.”

  Alex shrugged, and Jasmine put a hand on his chest, as if she owned it. As if she owned him. I found myself backing up a step. As if I were intruding on something I didn’t really want to see.

  A slight scowl from Marley was there and then gone in a flash as she looked at Jasmine.

  Alex took Jasmine’s hand off his chest and she tangled her fingers with his. His face was a careful blank, not something I’d ever seen on him before. He cleared his throat. “Well, I for one am glad I got you out of there so easily. We made a good pair for a while.”

  “Until I made it three,” Jasmine said. Even her voice was gorgeous. Low and sultry. Bloody hell, I was like a forest troll next to her.

  Oka laughed. “You are not a forest troll, Pam! You’re filthy, dirty as they come, but—”

  “Quiet, cat, or I’ll stuff you down to the bottom of my sleeping bag tonight.” I spoke, forgetting that Marley and Jasmine couldn’t hear her.

  Two sets of eyebrows went up. “Is she crazy?” Marley asked. “Cats can’t talk.”

  I let out a breath and took another step back so that Mac was right there, a breath away from me. “I’m not crazy. Oka is my familiar, and she can talk, and I can hear her. And sometimes she’s a damn cheeky little shit.”

  Oka leapt out of Marley’s arms.

  “And I am her other familiar.” Mac’s rumbling voice helped to soothe all the weird anxious jealousy that rippled through me.

  I nodded. “This is Mac. He’s saved me a few times already.” I looked over my shoulder at the man who I was sure I was falling for. Those blue eyes were solid, and they held me a moment. Then he nodded with a quick wink.

  I turned back to face Alex and his two girls. Two. One was like a sister, I could see that. The other was . . . more. Definitely more.

  Jasmine smirked and put her other hand on top of her first that she clung to Alex with. Part of me wondered not so much how he could have taken a mate but why in all that was holy would he take such an obvious . . .

  “Don’t say it,” Mac said.

  I bit the inside of my lip. I would never have used that word. Even if I thought it.

  “Runt,” I said. “She’s very runty.”

  Jasmine frowned. “I’m runty?”

  “Tiny,” I said. “Thin. Underfed.” Except for those boobs which, the more I saw them, the more wildly out of control they seemed.

  I sucked in a breath and tried to sort through my emotions. The truth was, the Pamela Alex had left behind was hurt, the little girl that had thought he was her best friend, who’d waited so long for him. And he’d taken someone else in her place.

  Of course, you could say I’d done the same thing with Mac, but that was . . . I don’t know why, it just felt different. Mac was meant to be with me, not only as my familiar but something else. Jasmine just looked like she was thumbing for a free ride.

  My mind raced with the possibilities of the last three years, and doubt crept in on the edges. Had Alex really been trying to find me, or had this been some twist of fate that threw us together? And what was I supposed to do now? Just forget I’d seen him and move on? The thought threatened to crush me. I didn’t want to say goodbye to him, not again.

  I cleared my throat, pushing away the downward spiral. Things had changed. I had changed, and clearly so had he. But our friendship hadn’t. And neither had our past. Thinking about those truths loosened my tongue and questions poured out of me.

  I motioned at him with one hand. “Alex, how can you shift all the way, I mean, your wolf form isn’t broken? And how did you find me?” I drew a breath and the other questions I’d not even realized waited on the tip of my tongue flew. “Have you seen Rylee and the others? Do they . . .” Bloody hell, I couldn’t ask that one. Did they hate me.

  Alex laughed, softly, at me. And that pretty much dried up all my desire to speak. Behind me, I felt Mac tense, felt him prep to come to my defense. Alex smiled, the corner of his mouth quirking up. He wasn’t being mean. I knew him enough to know that this was just him not seeing me for who I was.

  He still thought I was just some dewy-eyed little girl, not the caravan witch who’d survived the last three years on her own.

  “Not quite on your own,” Oka mumbled.

  Alex reached out and tousled my hair. “Oh, Pammy.” He rubbed my head just like he had Marley. He saw me as a child, not as an adult woman. “Always full of questions, and no answer will ever really satisfy you.”

  Anger snapped through me and the darkness in my blood chased it, fed it.

  Before the magic reached him, I knocked his hand away.

  You should trust your own magic, Pammy. The dark magic chuckled at me. Laughing at my fear and discomfort.

  A wash of shock raced across Alex’s face, but he cleared it with a shake of his head.

  Of all the ways I imagined this reunion going down, not once did I picture it like this. No. I thought he’d hold me forever, tell me he’d never leave me again. We’d promise to keep each other safe. But the reality was . . . well, it was fucking complicated in ways our early friendship had never had been. And I didn’t like it one bit.

  He reached for me again, maybe going for my shoulder, I don’t know.

  I held up a hand, one finger pointing to the sky. “Do not touch me.”

  His hand froze in the air, as if he wasn’t sure what to do with it.

  The darkness rose in me, slowly, warming my insides. Oka leaned against my leg, as if trying to give me strength against it.

  You could teach him a lesson, the dark magic whispered. Show him what happens to those who betray you.

  Oka hopped up onto my shoulder and tensed, the darkness taking her too. This had happened before. My magic had drawn her in and used her rage to fuel her violence.

  Bloody fucking hell, I had to rein this in.


  Show him you’re all grown up now and shouldn’t be treated like a child.

  I swallowed and struggled to push the magic down. But I must’ve been doing a piss-poor job at it, because Alex’s whole expression changed as he stared at my face. He wasn’t laughing at me anymore.

  Concern etched his brows and mouth, and his golden eyes were full of worry.

  He stepped just a hair closer to me. “Pam, are you okay?” Too close. He was too close.

  The desire to lash out at him was overwhelming and it took all I had to hold it back, to keep from hurting my friend. Almost. The magic threatened, and the sweat beaded on my forehead with the effort.

  “Pammy?” He reached out as if he would touch my face, gently, softly. Not a tussle, but gesture of concern. If he’d touched me that way the first time, would this be happening? The thought only made me realize he didn’t think of me that way. And as stupid as it was, it hurt.

  I cared for Mac. I didn’t want Alex, not really. But I wanted him to want me. How messed up was that? Totally messed up, I know.

  Before his hand reached my face, Oka swiped at him, claws extended, and he jerked away, tiny lines of red showing on his skin. Her tail lashed against my back and a low growl rumbled through her. “I believe you were asked not to touch. So, keep your damned hands to yourself, wolf.”

  He took a step back, frowning deeply, both hands up in a gesture of peace as the one dripped blood.

  “Got it. I meant nothing by it. Just . . .” He seemed to be at a loss for words too.

  Yes, this shattered world and our time in it had changed us both. But only one of us was still broken. He stood tall, his body whole, stronger than ever before as he looked down at me. No doubt he wondered what I’d become, what kind of person I was now.

  Shame like I’d not known in a long time beat a drum inside my head. What did he think of me? What would our mentor have thought of the person I’d become? Would they pull back, reel away in horror?

  “Easy,” Oka whispered. And from behind me, Mac reached out and just put a hand to my lower back, supporting me. But it wasn’t enough, not for the demons I battled.